


Ones and Zeros

by i_like_my_eggs_benedict



Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Anal Sex, Blow Jobs, Fluff, Jess and BB-8 play wing-men, Learning' some binary, M/M, lots of fluff, some body worship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-26
Updated: 2016-11-26
Packaged: 2018-08-13 00:45:18
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 13,452
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7955512
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/i_like_my_eggs_benedict/pseuds/i_like_my_eggs_benedict
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Finn was on a mission. He had formulated this plan based on his idea and desire to surprise Poe Dameron. All Finn could ever ask for was to make Poe happy. And impress him. And honestly, what could go wrong?</p><p>All Finn wanted to do was learn binary."</p><p> - Finn learns binary and ends up understanding more than he ever expected.</p><p>Something I had an idea for and thought "surely someone else has already done this." I have seen a couple fics with a similar idea, but nothing that followed the same path or had the same result as my idea, so I wrote it for my own mental sanity. It turned out way longer and way sexier than I ever would have predicted, but I made it long cause I had to build up to the hot steamy sex with tooth-rotting fluffiness between Poe and Finn. Nothin' better than that, amiright? </p><p>Enjoy friends. I had fun writing it and hope you will have fun reading it. NOW WITH ITALICS 'cause I'm dumb and it took me forever to figure out how to do them, which is a problem for someone who uses them as profusely as me. T-T</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Flight

Finn was on a mission. 

He had formulated this plan based on his idea and desire to surprise Poe Dameron. Now Finn had never previously executed a surprise having grown up on the Finalizer, but a surprise birthday party had been thrown for someone on the base last week and it seemed to make the person and everyone involved happy. And all Finn could ever ask for was to make Poe happy. And impress him. And honestly, what could go wrong?

All Finn wanted to do was learn binary.

He wanted to 1. Be closer to and understand BB-8 so he could actually be a part of conversations, 2. Surprise Poe by suddenly speaking easily to BB-8 in his presence (because, I mean, could you just imagine the look on Poe's face when Finn would just respond to BB-8 like it was nothing?), and 3. Impress the hell out of Poe.

It seemed straightforward enough. He had been somewhat of a prodigy when he was still a Stormtrooper according to his commanding officers, and -- for the intended purpose of future diplomatic endeavors -- he had learned over ten different languages in just over two years of training. That was an average of one every two months give-or-take. And he only got faster at learning them with each one he mastered. Binary couldn't be that complicated. 

As it turns out, binary was quite complicated. Turns out having just a 1 and a 0 as your entire alphabet forced you to have to get creative and lengthy in how you structure words, let alone full sentences. 

Finn raided the base's records library one day when Poe went on a simple recon mission. He grabbed text books, recordings, pamphlets, anything that could possibly help him. Luckily he had become quite well-acquainted with the record-keeper at the base, because when he emerged from the depths of the archive with a pile of resources threatening to overflow in his arms, they didn't even bat an eye. Finn came here often, as he usually had nothing else to do (he was still technically in recovery from his wounds, and wasn't familiar with many people other than the ones that were close to Poe), so he got some special treatment from the keeper. She watched amused as Finn methodically wrote his name in the logbook next to everything he planned to take.

"Learnin' some binary there?" she asked with a tilt to the corners of her mouth.

Finn looked up from his task with an embarrassed smile. "Yeah," he replied. "I'm gonna learn and then surprise Poe and BB-8." He was getting excited just talking about it. It was the first time he said it out loud, and the first person to know other than himself. Now he knew why people got such a thrill from planning these surprises.

The record-keeper's smile just got bigger. "And how do you plan on hidin' all that from Poe?"

"Oh, I've got a plan." He did. He and Poe were living in the same quarters now, ever since he got released from the med-bay, and he knew that would be a risk. But one time not too long ago, Poe got him a chest to put what few things he actually owned inside. Poe said he had wanted to make sure Finn felt like this was his home and that he had things of his own, and he promised that he would never snoop inside (not that Finn expected him to anyway). He had no idea where Poe had gotten the chest, as he had waved it off when Finn had asked, but he had a suspicion that Poe had bought it brand new instead of just grabbing one of the ones in storage. That chest would be where he stashed all these learning materials.

He didn't know how the record-keeper knew he lived with Poe, he didn't think he had ever mentioned it. But he cast it aside and finished up writing down his name over and over. She was nice enough to give him a small cart to transport it all, and right before he left he quickly turned back as a last safety measure.

"Don't tell Poe," he said earnestly.

She just laughed lightly and responded, "Don't worry, I won't."

And with that, Finn had left to get a head start on his studies. He had a couple challenges in this, like how he couldn't study when Poe was around. Or how he couldn't practice personally with a droid such as BB-8 (Finn was pretty sure BB-8 simply wasn’t capable of keeping secrets from Poe). But that's why Finn got some recordings to listen to and practice with. He learned best through aural stimulation. 

And besides, he could still technically practice when Poe and BB-8 talked to one another. He could listen to BB-8's intonation, learn what was being said based on that or Poe's response even if Finn didn't know exactly what BB-8 was saying. It would slow down his time frame a bit, but not by much. He would just have to work extra hard.

Within a week he had mastered the binary structural patterns and coding. Next step was the aural stimulation, and getting used to hearing the words crafted from just beeps and whirs. He started listening to recordings of binary every single day when he got the chance, and paying extra close attention when BB-8 spoke. He barely understood any of it still after a month, because he realized very quickly that BB-8 spoke incredibly fast. 

Poe came running down the hall one day with BB-8 blinking and beeping and rolling not far behind. Finn was to the point where he could understand that BB-8 was yelling his own name all the way down the hall. 

[Friend Finn! Friend Finn!] BB-8 beeped over and over. And then he said something else Finn couldn't understand. Finn realized that maybe why BB-8 talked so fast all the time was because the droid was always excited about something.

Poe had the biggest smile as he rushed towards Finn, and for a moment Finn had trouble breathing. He was coming from the hangar, and the sunlight that flooded in created a halo around Poe's entire being. Finn had always thought that Poe was a beautiful person, but it seemed like more and more the world thought it was necessary to give him reminders.

"Finn!" Poe said, as he grasped Finn's shoulders in delight. "I was hoping to find you!" Poe's proximity and breathlessness didn't help the fact that Finn was melting from his words. "There's something I want to show you."

BB-8 started beeping excitedly again, and that was the first time Finn heard Poe's name in binary (he had experimented with whistling to try and imitate what he thought it might sound like one night, but it didn’t seem right). Maybe it was because Poe and BB-8 were so close, but even the programmed blips sounded beautiful to Finn when he knew they added up to "Poe". Finn already had unconscious reactions when he heard "Poe" in standard tongue, and now he had to hear it every time BB-8 said it, too.

Poe just smiled wider when Finn stuttered, "S-sure." He heard an elongated whirr from BB-8 that he definitely knew was not a word but a droid's equivalent of a sigh. He looked at BB-8 oddly as Poe turned to go the direction he came, expecting Finn to follow. Sometimes Finn wished that Poe would just take his hand when he wanted to show him something.

Finn caught up and Poe explained it to him. "We got a new ship in this morning," Poe said. "Top of the line. Beautiful piece of machinery." Finn loved when Poe talked shop. He never lit up brighter than when he talked about his favorite thing in the world. "We got it in a special supply courier sent from what's left of our allies that have gone into hiding since Starkiller. There wasn’t much else, but this one is a gem."

Finn stopped staring at Poe's profile just as they emerged into the hangar and into the shadow of one of the most breathtaking space crafts that he had ever seen. It certainly didn't look like anything he had ever seen before. Long, sleek, thin. Finn knew next to nothing about ships, but even he knew just by looking that this was something special. Majestic was the word that came to mind. Imposing and mighty and powerful, it just seemed like a symbol of hope for the Resistance.

He looked back at Poe and he was looking right back at him. He realized he may have just been gaping at this ship for an embarrassingly long time, and he got flustered. "Sorry, I just, kind of —"

Poe just laughed and the sound hit Finn in his chest. "It's fine. I completely understand," Poe comforted. "It's nice to know you appreciate her as well."

"Is there a special purpose for…her?” Finn tried to talk about ships like Poe did. It felt strange on his tongue and like he was maybe disrespecting Poe as a pilot, but he didn't seem to mind.

"Oh, she’ll hardly be used at all unless we really need her." Poe started to walk towards one of the wings that stretched elegantly from the body of the ship. "It's a damn shame she'll spend most of her time in a hangar, but it would also be a waste to have her on simple recon missions. She's a fighter jet, not meant for transportation. Modeled after the classic Delta-7 Jedi Starfighter, it improved on practically everything about the old model and was designed with stealth in mind as well. We're trying to keep the fact that we have a powerful ship like this a secret as well, so it would be stupid to flaunt her around the galaxy. She's a bit of a secret weapon at the moment." They had reached the ship, and Poe gently ran his hand along the shiny surface. Finn didn't dare. "She's also very new, so new in fact she doesn’t even have a model name. So many complicated flying mechanisms that we need time to fine-tune her and get a pilot comfortable with operating the systems. Only one person is allowed to fly this ship."

"Who's that?" Finn asked.

"Me." Poe beamed at him like a kid with a new toy. Finn should have known the best pilot would get the best ship. "I had to get her ready this morning when she came in which is why I was gone so early, but I couldn't wait to tell you once she was in here."

Finn remembered waking up this morning and seeing Poe wasn't there. It happened every so often, but it always made Finn sigh into the empty room. They usually ate breakfast together with Snap and Jess and many other pilots. But if Poe was gone, that meant the other pilots were, too. On those days Finn would just bring his food back to the room and eat while he studied binary.

"Thank you, Poe," Finn said. "Thanks for showing me this. She truly is incredible."

Poe's eyes glinted out of the softer look he had just had. "You wanna take her up?"

"What, you mean, like, watch you fly?"

Poe laughed again. "I mean, yes. But from inside the ship."

"Oh, no, Poe I can't. You're supposed to fly her."

"Yeah, but I'm still getting used to it all. I could really use your help.”

“Are you sure?” Finn asked, still very uncertain. He looked sideways at Poe, hoping that he took the opportunity to rethink his proposal.

Poe just looked right back at him. “Yeah, I’m sure, buddy. Come on, Jess will get you fitted with some equipment.”

Jessica Pava frightened Finn somewhat. She had never done anything to him of course, never directly tried to do anything that would scare Finn, but Finn had found he was good at getting a read on people. And Jess was unpredictable. Something about her personality kept him on edge. She exuded this aura that made people around her feel like they would do anything to be in her good graces. He had seen it in action, but it comforted him that he had never actually seen Jessica overtly abuse this power she had over others.

Finn had sat with the pilots for a couple meals when Poe was around, but he had hardly ever had a one-on-one exchange with Jess. Partly because she seemed to always be busy and most of the time had irregular meal patterns (it was a joke among the pilots that Jess was unexpectedly more of a workaholic than Poe was). And when she was there, she mainly muttered things to the side to Snap. Bottom line, Finn had an irrational fear of her.

Jess was rummaging through the supply box of the hangar trying to find a suit that would fit Finn, and Finn stood awkwardly to the side by himself. BB-8 and Poe were off getting things ready for the flight. Finn wasn’t sure if it would be better if he offered his help to Jess, or insulting if he did so, giving Jess the impression that Finn was impatient or wasn’t grateful for her help.

She turned and handed him a flight suit, bringing him out of his stress spiral. “Here you go. All yours. It’s not the best, but it’ll do for now. Maybe if you go up again we’ll be able to find you a better one.”

Nothing in her tone sounded sarcastic or jealous, but none-the-less Finn’s brain went into hyper drive. Was the fact that Poe was taking Finn up in the shiny new ship insulting to Jess? She was easily more qualified than Finn to be operating stuff like that, and Poe and her seemed close. Jess was really pretty. Maybe she liked Poe? Maybe Poe liked her too? Finn was starting to ache all over. He felt like he had to say something.

“Thank you…for this. Um, it’s great, thank you,” he stuttered. Jess just nodded while trying to stuff back in all of the other flight suits back into the crate she pulled them out of. Finn had to continue. Poe and BB-8 weren’t done and he didn’t feel content with leaving his first real interaction with Jess like this. “I-I don’t really know why Poe is doing this. Why he’s bringing me on this brand new ship. I have no idea what I’m doing, and clearly you’d be the best choice to assist with something like this.”

Jess paused for a moment, turned back around, and just stared at Finn. He forced himself not to shift around from discomfort. Right when he thought he’d said something horribly wrong, Jess broke into a wide white smile, then into an even brighter laugh. Finn was not prepared for it. She seemed to do a complete 180 in about two seconds, and Finn wasn’t sure if it made him more or less afraid of her. But gosh, she really was beautiful. Even more so when she was smiling.

She grabbed his shoulder and sighed out the rest of her laughter. “Sorry, sorry for laughing I just—Finn, I am the _last_ person that should be up in that ship with Dameron. Have you ever seen two pilots try and man a ship together for the first time? Especially with _our_ personalities? I love Poe like he’s my brother, but damn, we’d strangle each other to death before we ever left the ground.”

Finn couldn’t help but smile back at her. She was nice. This was nice. It was starting to feel like he was talking with a good friend. Like he was talking with Rey. “Yeah, huh, I guess that makes sense,” he told her. “But I still don’t understand why he’s taking _me_.”

Jess gave him an odd look for a second. “You serious?” she asked, with no malice behind it so Finn didn’t panic. “Finn, Poe adores you. Never shuts up about you. I figured he just wanted to put two things he cares about together. Share something he loved with you. And besides, having a newbie up there learning controls fresh out of the gate is good for a ship that size and that complex. Poe’s not entirely stupid, trust me.”

Poe adored him? Finn felt like his legs were gonna give out from under him or something. He felt helpless and was trying not to show it, so he just nodded weakly and said “Okay.”

Jess smiled wider. “You adore him too.” It wasn’t a question. Finn was gonna pass out. It’s hot on this planet, he thinks. Was it always this hot here? Did he have to put on this giant orange flight suit? He would combust.

“Poe’s great,” Finn said lamely.

Jess giggled lightly under her breath. “That’s not quite what I meant, but sure.”

Finn was going to regret asking this but, “What did you mean?”

“What does what mean?”

Finn jumped from hearing Poe’s voice come from behind him. Luckily, it didn’t seem like Poe had heard all of the conversation before this and just caught the tail-end of it.

Finn was floundering for an explanation, but shockingly for Finn, Jess came to his rescue in a split second. “Oh nothing, just talking shop with Finn. I need to learn how to turn it off, huh Poe?”

“Uh —“ Poe floundered as well, but Jess cut him off.

“Well, looks like your ship is ready for boarding, boys.” She physically turned Poe and Finn away from her and pushed them towards the ship. “You should get to it.” Then, as they were walking away and she was moving back to her own work, she added, “Tell me when the wedding is!”

And then Finn couldn’t deny what Jess had really meant by her previous statements. Just when he thought she had come to his rescue, she put his feet over the fire again. He knew he had gotten a dangerous vibe from her. And now he didn’t dare risking a glance at Poe to see his reaction.

“Get back to your own work, Pava!” Poe yelled back. He turned back and muttered to Finn, “Sorry about that.”

Finn just nodded, and BB-8 whirred a sentence that Finn could tell contained both his and Poe’s name.

“Yeah, yeah, alright,” Poe groaned at BB-8. “Hush up.”

The worst thing was not the playful teasing that made Finn squirm, but the fact that Finn now saw how uncomfortable it made Poe. He had apologized to Finn for it, making it clear he believed it was something that required an apology. Something inside Finn sank slowly and painfully into the pit of his stomach as he stripped off Poe’s stitched-up leather jacket. He just had on a thin grey t-shirt underneath that clung to his body because it was actually Poe’s as well. Now that Finn thought about it, his pants were Poe’s too, short enough that they showed Finn’s ankles. He really ought to get his own clothing. He was thinking about dropping by the supply room later today when he noticed Poe staring at his chest.

“Is something wrong? I know I’m wearing your clothes all the time, I’ll get my own today,” Finn offered.

“No, no I don’t mind, really,” Poe replied quickly. “I was just thinking you should take off your pants.” Finn’s heart gave a jolt. “I-I mean I wasn’t thinking — You, you don’t have to take off your pants if you don’t want to. Just — it can get hot, and I take off mine. But it’s up to you. I mean, it’s your choice. I’ll uh, I’ll be in the ship when you’re ready.” 

BB-8 beeped once as they walked into the ship, and Poe replied with, “I said to hush it up, you.”

And with that he was gone, and Finn was left standing on the flight deck with a jacket in one hand, a flight suit in the other, and a choice to make. Once he entered the cockpit, Poe grabbed a headset and handed it to Finn. If he noticed that Finn was holding his pants as well, he didn’t show it.

“This will help us communicate while the ship’s going. It can get pretty loud.” Then Poe gave him a wink. The thing in Finn’s stomach jumped.

Once he put on the headset, he couldn’t hear a thing. It was slightly terrifying, because he could see Poe mouthing words but couldn’t for the life of him figure out what he was trying to say. Then Poe pointed to a small chair in front of a side console to the right of the pilot seat.

“Oh!” Finn exclaimed, but didn’t hear except for the vibrations in his body. He sat in the seat and buckled in. When he realized he had no idea what to do next while simply staring down at the blinking lights on the console, he looked back to Poe for help. He saw Poe now in his own headset, flipping switches and pressing buttons and checking levels on the ship. He truly was in his element. He looked so good, Finn thought, like the dashing fighter pilot people talked non-stop about.

Finn didn’t know how long he stared, but in the dead silence, it was easy to feel like he wasn't there. Like he was just watching a holovid of a beautiful pilot preparing for takeoff. Then suddenly the pilot’s eyes caught his, and it was clear that no, he wasn’t watching a video. He was here, and that pretty pilot could see him ogling.

Poe turned a few knobs then flipped a switch, and suddenly sound rushed to Finn’s ears. Beeps and whirrs and the sound of Poe’s voice.

“Can you hear me?” Poe asked.

“Yes,” Finn replied, hearing his own voice doubled in his ears.

“It’s not too loud?”

“No, it’s great.” Finn could hear all the gravel and frequencies of Poe’s voice in striking clarity. It was fantastic.

“Great. Just let me know if it’s too much.” Finn listened past Poe’s voice for a moment to hone in on the beeping in the background.

“Is that BB-8?”

“Yeah, they’re communicating codes and sequences to me, so I turned down their levels on your sound.”

“Can you turn them up?”

Poe gave him a look. “BB-8 can hear us just fine. And I can relay all the info to you.”

“No, yeah, I know but —“ I want to hear binary in action. “I want to hear what you hear.” That wasn’t really a lie. It just wasn’t the whole truth.

Poe stared back and turned a little red in the face. “Uh, yeah, yeah sure buddy. Whatever you want.” He twisted another dial and BB-8’s twitters clarified in Finn’s ears.

[Hello Freind-Finn! Hello!]

“Hello to you too, BB-8,” Finn laughed, without really thinking.

Poe just laughed lightly, casting him a glance. “Lucky guess.”

“What?” Finn said, panicking and trying not to show it.

“BB-8 happened to be saying hello as well.”

“Haha, wow. Crazy.” Finn swallowed thickly. He’d have to be more careful.

“Okay, so BB-8 says you need to enter a code on this panel right here.” He pointed to a blinking set of numbers and letters on Finn’s console. “They’ll give me the code and I’ll relay it back to you so you can enter it.”

“Okay,” Finn confirmed.

“Ready?”

“Yeah.”

[3] BB-8 beeped.

Finn almost went to enter 3 before he remembered he wasn’t supposed to understand. Unfortunately, numbers and letters were something he had down pat in binary. He had mastered them two weeks ago and had moved on to understanding full phrases like “My name is…,” and “What should I call you?”

He held back his hand and waited until he heard Poe say the numbers before he entered them. His lack of patience and eagerness to please still got the best of him though, because Poe remarked on how fast he entered the codes. It was somewhat worth the admiring gaze Poe gave him and his offhand comment that Finn would make a great co-pilot. It made Finn know that eventually his hard work at learning binary would pay off in compliments from Poe that would make him feel warm inside.

It felt like forever that they were just sitting in the cockpit on the tarmac and pressing button after button. Poe apologized for the lengthy preparation, but assured Finn that it was entirely necessary for a new ship as big and complicated as this one and that it would definitely be worth it in the end. Finn just assured back that he didn’t mind at all, and that he trusted Poe. Poe turned red again and again Finn worried that words like that made Poe uncomfortable. The pit of his stomach went through ups and downs like that multiple times in that hour or so of prep, and they hadn’t even taken off yet.

He really didn’t mind though. Being close to Poe for this amount of time was wonderful, and Finn had always wanted to know what Poe did at work while he was away from Finn. _And_ Finn picked up on a lot of binary, regardless of the fact that most of it had to do with machinery and flying. He learned the sounds for up, down, left, right, forwards, backwards, on, off, in, out, red, yellow, blue, green, and even some shapes. It was all very basic stuff, but the most valuable thing about this time was simply listening to the ever-flowing conversation between Poe and BB-8. It helped Finn hear the nuance of tone and sentence structure, and even some slang, which no book on binary can teach you.

After about an hour and a half of grueling tests and technicalities, Poe cracked his back and smiled.

“Alright,” he said, “I think she’s ready for her first flight. Are you?”

It took Finn a moment to realize Poe was addressing him. He was mentally a little fried, and it took BB-8 buzzing [Freind-Finn!] for him to snap out of it.

“Oh! Yeah. Sorry, I’m just a little tired.”

Poe laughed, almost deviously. He looked so excited. “Well, this will wake you up.” And then he kicked the engine into gear, and the whole ship vibrated beneath Finn, and it really did wake him up. Finn had never been in a groundquake, but he imagined that this is what it would feel like. But unlike a groundquake, Finn felt completely safe since Poe was piloting the craft. The jolt as the ship began to turn inside the hangar shook Finn to his bones, the anticipation of flight tingled to his toes, and the look on Poe’s face warmed him down his spine.

Finn could now see the wide open sky through the glass view-panel, and the excited butterflies in his stomach doubled. The vibration increased as they started to move forward out of the hangar. The ship was so loud now that even the headset couldn’t keep out the hum of the engine.

“Give me your hand!” he heard Poe shout over the noise. Finn looked at him, and Poe was holding out his hand to him. He slowly handed Poe’s right hand his left one. “You need to really feel it. There’s nothing like taking off!” The sun glinted off of Poe’s visor and his teeth, nearly blinding Finn.

Poe placed Finn’s hand gently over the right steering shift and placed his hand on top. Poe was right. The vibrations tingled and pricked Finn’s fingertips, like a direct line of connection between his hand and the engine. The combination of all of these sensations — the excitement of taking of, the thrum of the engine, the heat of Poe’s hand on top of his — were overwhelming for Finn. He felt overheated, like his heart was going to burst. He was glad he had taken off his pants.

“This isn’t safe!” Finn yelled over the comms. It was getting loud.

“It’s fine!” Poe said. “I’m right here.” Finn felt Poe’s thumb stroke against his.

Finn had meant that this wasn’t safe for his heart.

With his free hand, almost as an afterthought, Finn buckled himself in. If not for the simple safety measure, then for simply giving himself something to focus on other than the texture of Poe’s palm.

When he looked up again, they were out in the open, speeding up immensely. The pressure pushed Finn back in his seat, making the strain of keeping his hand on the controls quite awkward, but Poe kept him grounded. The sensation spreading through his hand continued up his arm, down his spine, and to the tips of his toes. They were turning up, up, facing nothing but endless blue sky. It was so loud. Finn could vaguely make out Poe whooping beside him and a squee from BB-8 that Finn was pretty sure was the equivalent of a human going “Wheee!” Finn thought about closing his eyes for a split second, but immediately fought against it. He wanted to see it all. He wanted to see and feel and hear what Poe did. He wanted to experience something that Poe loved through Poe’s eyes.

And just when he thought he couldn’t possibly take any more, the ship leveled out, gave one last burst of fuel, and then they were simply sailing across the skyline. The roar in Finn’s body dulled into a pleasant hum that complimented the blue sky nicely. He couldn’t see anything below them, just sky, and it felt like they were somewhere else. The world around him was silent again.

“How’s that?” asked Poe. It had a joking tone, but Finn took it seriously anyway.

“It’s beautiful, Poe.” He meant it. “And the takeoff was just…incredible.”

Poe smiled wider. “Told ya.” He winked again, and again stroked Finn’s hand that still sat beneath his. Finn wasn’t sure if Poe even realized he did that, but he wasn’t complaining. And he wasn’t taking his hand away either. If Poe didn’t do anything to move it, then _he_ certainly wasn’t going to — he would milk this as long as it would last.

BB-8 chirped something that Finn believed contained the word “fuel”, and Poe’s smile faltered a bit.

“I wish we could actually take her somewhere,” Poe commented, “but unfortunately we used up most of what little fuel she had in her to test the engines back on the ground.”

“Oh,” said Finn. He couldn’t think very well at the moment. He was tired — mentally, physically, emotionally — and he also needed to recover from the flight that his heart was trying to take straight out of his chest.

“But they’re re-fueling every engine tomorrow, and I could uh, maybe take you somewhere the day after that?” Poe seemed to be nervous, but for what reason Finn couldn’t even begin to guess.

“Yeah, I’d love to go on another flight with you, Poe.” Finn couldn’t possibly turn down another opportunity to see Poe like this, even if the sheer amount of adrenaline it gave him threatened to kill him. He liked the rush, and he liked Poe Dameron.

Poe turned a little red again, and smiled softly. “Great,” he said. Then he slowly turned the ship around to land her. Their hands didn’t separate until the engines were turned off back on the ground.

The next day was re-fueling day for all of the ships, and Poe needed to be there the entire time. Because re-fueling didn’t just mean the act of filling the tanks, oh no, they did that all the time. “Re-fueling” in this sense meant actually completely cleaning out the tanks, the cockpits, the engines, and the entire cargo-bay and main hangar. “Worst day of the year,” Poe had said that morning, laughing, “It’s an all-hands-on-deck sort of thing, so I’ll be gone until late. I’ll try and see you for dinner, okay?” Then Finn reminded him to make sure he ate _something_ today. Poe promised, then seemed like he wanted to say or do something else, but instead he just waved and walked out with BB-8 following behind him.

Finn took this chance to do a marathon of binary study, only leaving the room for meals and an occasional walk around base to keep his mind from melting out his ears. He would assist with some cleaning or organization, but tried to stay out of anyone’s way who didn’t need him around. By dinner, Finn knew every word in the dictionary and could understand most simple sentences in binary. 

Poe wasn’t at dinner, but Finn heard him enter their room late that night and collapse into his own bed. Finn had the overwhelming urge to go over and massage Poe’s tired muscles and curl up into his warm body, but resisted, and rested easy knowing Poe was back for the night.

The next day, Finn found himself back in the horrid orange flight suit. He had taken careful precautions to wear light pants so he wouldn’t have to go through the excruciating embarrassment of changing when they got to wherever Poe was planning on taking them. He had told Finn that they wouldn’t be leaving the planet, but Finn was still just a bit nervous. Poe seemed excited about it though, whatever or wherever it was, and that was good enough for Finn.

Finn was only slightly disappointed when Poe didn’t hold his hand on the way up again.

They flew lower than last time so Finn could see below them. The ride wasn’t long, and he marveled at the sights throughout. They only flew to the other side of the planet, but even so, Poe remarked on the speed of the craft.

“She moves like that TIE Fighter we escaped on,” he said, in awe. Finn’s memory of his first meeting of Poe warmed him. Poe looked so pleased. “We’ll kick some First Order ass with this beautiful beast. I’m thinking of naming her _Nayanta_. What do you think?” Finn affirmed his approval of the name and had a feeling it was the name of someone Poe knew. He tried not to feel jealous of whoever it was, but failed.

Poe landed in a clearing that seemed far from anything else on the planet, Resistance or otherwise (Finn was aware that there was an indigenous species on the planet, but they were sympathetic to the cause and even helped clear space for a Resistance base away from their homes so they wouldn’t bother one another). “We’re here,” Poe said, and immediately shucked off his headset and part of his jumpsuit before hopping out of the cockpit. Finn rushed to follow suit, not having any idea where they were going.

Poe enlightened him only somewhat on their way there. “I like flying — obviously,” he laughed, “— and I also like finding these nice little private nooks and crannies that I can have to myself. I found this one about a month into our stay here. I still remember the first time I found it. Things were insane back at base, we were still setting up camp and people were running around like banthas with their heads cut off. I just needed a break, some time to myself, and just like that this planet showed mercy on me and gave me this spot.”

“So what is it?” Finn asked.

“You’ll see,” Poe smiled to himself.

Too bad for Poe, but BB-8 suddenly started asking questions. Finn just knew they were questions, not about the contents necessarily. Finn could understand that the questions were about himself though, and before he could hear anything that could possibly ruin Poe’s surprise, he fell behind a bit and discreetly as possible covered his ears. On one hand, he was glad that this meant his binary was improving, but on the other he was really upset that his newfound skill was now having the opposite desired effect and was excluding him from conversations even more now. He desperately wished he could share the good news of his progress with Poe and BB-8, but he just couldn’t. Not yet.

It’ll all be worth it, It’ll all be worth it, he repeated to himself.

He had gotten so wrapped up in his own head that he hadn’t even realized he was now standing right in front of a lake until he almost walked right in. Poe caught him and pulled his hands away from his ears. The maneuver brought Finn in a position where Poe was now technically holding him in his arms and looking at him really up close.

“You alright, buddy? Why are you covering your ears? Is something wrong? We should go back —“

“No! No, Poe I’m fine, I just… My ears are still adjusting from the headset and the sounds on the ship, I was just…helping them adjust.”

Poe looked at him, and Finn wondered if he actually believed him or not. Either way, Poe nodded and thusly accepted the explanation. He gestured to the water.

“This is my own private swimming hole. I always loved to swim, I come here when I want to relax. Clear my head, just float around, y’know? Truth be told, I always preferred the beach, but this is nice.”

Finn looked around. It wasn’t a large lake, more like a pond. But the water was clear and moderately deep. It was sheltered by trees all around, making it feel extra small and cozy. With the trees came shade, which was remarkable and a nice break considering the extreme heats that this planet could reach. Honestly, just looking at the gently rippling surface made Finn want to jump right in.

“Oh, I forgot to ask,” Poe said, “do you know how to swim?” He seemed hesitant to bring up even the slightest hint of Finn’s upbringing, but Finn really didn’t mind.

“Yeah, I know how to swim,” Finn responded. Poe looked just the slightest bit surprised. Finn continued, “It’s true that there isn’t much use for that kind of skill on a giant metal ball hurtling through space, but our officers wanted us to be prepared for anything.” Finn smiled at Poe. “I can hold my breath for four minutes and seventeen seconds.” He actually was quite proud of that. He was proud of all his accomplishments, be they directed by the First Order or not. They were still his. “They only had a small swimming tank though. Shallow with lots of salt to make sure it was nearly impossible for someone to drown. This will be my first time swimming in real, natural, unfiltered water.”

“Well then,” Poe said, removing his shirt, “there’s no time to lose.” Before Finn could even process what was happening, Poe was in his underwear and wading into the water. BB-8 just rolled back and forth across the shore beeping what Finn translated to repetitions of [Poe! Poe! Get in, Freind-Finn, get in! Do it! Do it!]

Finn somewhat shyly began to strip. It seemed like in the end, he regretted putting on pants for this trip. He had gone back and forth on the matter, and if he had known he would just be taking them off anyway, he never would have worn them. They kind of itched under the flight suit. They were a new pair he picked up from storage, and not one of Poe’s. Finn stubbornly refused to believe that was the only reason they didn’t feel right. Finn was forced to stop thinking about it when BB-8 not-so-gently knocked into his shins from behind, urging him in.

The water was cold (unlike the small tank back on board the First Order base he was raised in, whose water temperature was kept at a perfect 98.6 degrees). It did feel kind of good though, considering the heat. Finn met Poe in the middle of the small lake, and could just barely touch the bottom. The sensation of grass and rocks caressing his ankles with every movement was strange to say the least, but it was nice. The mere existence of nature surrounding Finn was something he found comforting.

“Now what?” Finn asked.

“We swim. Or float. Or dive. Whatever you want,” Poe said smiling.

Finn smiled back. “Can we…float?”

And then they were floating. Just drifting side-by-side and watching the endless blue sky through the opening in the treetops. A light breeze came by and they started to drift apart, but Poe took hold of Finn’s hand and told him they could stay together that way. Finn didn’t say anything.

While floating was really nice, it was quite difficult when most of Finn’s weight was pure muscle. His density forced his ears beneath the surface where he couldn’t hear the wind or the consistent sound of Poe’s breathing, so after a while he righted himself. Poe did so as well, not letting go of his hand.

“Sorry,” Finn explained, “It’s easier to float when there’s a lifetime’s-worth of salt in the water.”

“That’s okay, I understand. Do you want to just, stay like this for a moment?”

“Yeah, yeah, I’d like that.”

Then suddenly, things changed. Or maybe everything just came into focus for Finn in that moment. He noticed BB-8 was now nowhere to be seen, the distant beeping gone leaving only the sounds of two men breathing and the quiet lap of water around them. Finn was also very aware of Poe’s hand still holding his under the water. And also just how close Poe had gotten.

For one crazy, terrifying, wonderful moment, Finn really thought Poe was going to kiss him. 

Finn would bet everything that Poe’s body would still be warm, even in the cold water. And his lips would be wet from the swim, and Finn’s fingers would get caught in the damp tangles of his hair. He was so close. Right there, and he truly believed it was about to happen. 

They seemed to be hanging on the precipice of _something_ for the longest time and then, just like that, Poe let go of his hand and the spell was broken.

Poe coughed lightly. “I did bring some towels, but I was so eager to get here I left them on the ship. I’ll go grab them, be right back.” And as quickly as Poe had entered the water, he left. The disappointment racking Finn’s body overrode any plus side of seeing Poe’s wet back muscles flex as he swam away.

Finn sighed, then dunked his head underwater. He stayed down for four minutes and eight seconds.

By the time they were preparing for takeoff from the forest, it was dusk. The setting sun came directly into the cockpit, nearly blinding Finn. He put on his headset as soon as possible on purpose, so that for one moment in the silence, he could pretend he was just a viewer watching Poe from afar again. It seemed easier than having to acknowledge that he was right by Poe’s side and Poe still didn’t notice him.

And that’s when Finn realized, with striking clarity in the silence of his own mind, that he was in love with Poe Dameron.


	2. Fight

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Gosh this turned out to be way raunchier than I had planned. It gets pretty down and dirty, but I labeled this explicit so you get what you pay for. Enjoy kiddies!

It didn’t hurt at first. But an ache slowly built up over time.

Particularly due to the fact that Finn and Poe now went up in the ship at least every other day. Three days after their swimming excursion, Finn was cleared for activity by the medical staff, and Poe was so over the moon that he took Finn on a victory lap just for the hell of it and asked if he’d like to continue helping Poe with getting the ship in fighting shape. And Finn was so high on the adrenaline as well that he agreed without a second thought. It would be great.

And it was great for a time. Finn heard binary all the time now and was becoming more fluent every day. Scratch that — Finn got better every _hour_ spent on the ship. Finn also didn’t have to pretend to not know what BB-8 was saying anymore because he knew all the codes by heart now and didn’t need to be told.

Finn and Poe laughed together, took lunch together, went to showers after a hard day’s work together (as much as that experience was horribly nerve-racking for Finn every time he saw Poe start to undress to get into his private stall). But no moment like the one they had alone on the lake ever occurred again. And the second Finn thought about it, _really_ thought about it, he got depressed.

That moment they had on the lake was literally the _perfect_ opportunity for anything to happen between them, and Poe had passed it by. He had been the one to break it in fact. And for Finn, that was the final blow that confirmed to him that Poe wasn’t interested like he was. For the longest time Finn still had a subconscious sliver of hope, but it was gone now. The small feeling that used to jump in the pit of his stomach every time he saw Poe had lost its will to live and shriveled up and died inside of him. And _that’s_ when it started to hurt.

Finn would wander around the base aimlessly. His binary books served him no purpose now, not even as a distraction. He was completely fluent now, hearing previously unheard conversations everywhere he turned. He was going to reveal the surprise soon, he had decided, but at the moment he was too busy wallowing in his depression to make a grand plan on how to surprise Poe. 

Poe.

Poe was beginning to notice Finn’s lack of energy. Finn could tell he was trying to cheer him up, too. For a bit it seemed like Poe thought maybe the constant flights were tiring him out, so he made a point to plan a day-in with Finn where they just watched holovids and drank. But when that didn’t work he continued the flights and just coddled Finn through them to make sure he wasn’t wearing himself out, but Finn just hated that even more. Finn didn’t have it in him to tell Poe to just stop. That it was Poe who was making Finn tired and lazy all the time. One night as they were settling into bed, Poe took another shot at it.

“Hey, buddy. I was just uh, wondering if you’d like to go back to the lake tomorrow. Just like last time. We can take a relaxing day off,” Poe offered.

Finn looked at Poe and immediately regretted it. He looked so excited and so hopeful, meaning it would break Finn’s heart even more to turn it down.

“No, sorry, I don’t think so. I promised I would help the record-keeper organize a bit, which could take all day.” That wasn’t a lie, just not the whole truth. Finn was going to the archives tomorrow, but it was only to return the tons of books on binary he had borrowed. He could ask to help out when he was there, no problem.

Finn watched in agony as Poe’s face shattered into disappointment. Finn had to look away. He knew Poe was just trying to help, but there was nothing he could do to make Finn feel better. When he spent time with Poe he was miserable, and when they were apart, Finn felt even worse.

“Oh, alright,” said Poe, ever-so-softly. “Maybe another time, then.” And then he rolled over on his bed to go to sleep, leaving Finn to turn off the lights.

Finn cried that night — silently and alone as he had done many times back with the First Order.

Finn was so _tired_. He didn’t know where all his energy had gone. He had resolved to tell Poe soon that he was going to switch rooms, and that he should find another person to assist with _Nayanta_. He knew Poe wouldn’t be happy, but it would be easier for Finn this way. The rational part of Finn’s brain told him he was being selfish, but he was too tired to care.

They were now preparing for the last flight Finn would be taking with Poe, but Poe didn’t know that. Finn went to grab his flight suit from the racks, and when he returned he caught the conversation BB-8 and Poe were having in weirdly hushed tones.

[Did you even try?] BB-8 whirred.

“Of course I tried!” Poe responded, and he seemed really frustrated.

[Didn’t seem like it. I made sure to leave you alone at the lake and you still did nothing. That was your chance!]

“I know! I tried to ask him to go again, but he said no. He doesn’t seem like he’s up for much of anything these days, let alone _that_ conversation.”

Finn had no idea what they were talking about but he knew it involved him. He shouldn’t be surprised. BB-8 was probably worried about him too, and it made Finn feel a little sick and a lot guilty. Especially since he also didn’t feel comfortable eavesdropping like this. They didn’t even know he understood BB-8, so he decided he would just walk up like normal so they would be forced to stop the conversation.

As he walked over BB-8 was twittering, [Maybe Freind-Finn needs his hardware looked at.] Finn plopped down his suit loudly to announce his presence and Poe jumped. He was bright red.

“Uh, hey, Finn. Buddy,” he stuttered.

[Smooth,] BB-8 clicked.

“Shut up,” Poe said.

[I am just saying you may not get that perfect chance again. You have to just go for it, it’s never going to be the right time.]

Finn was squirming from discomfort. BB-8 clearly wasn’t done with the conversation, and Finn was still eavesdropping unbeknownst to them.

“BB-8, not now,” Poe hissed.

[Relax, he can’t understand me. And now you can’t openly disagree with me.]

“Please, BB-“

[No, Poe! You’re driving yourself crazy with this. If you don’t tell him you love him soon, he’s going to find someone else.]

Finn gripped the wrench in his hand so tight he thought it might break.

“You don’t know that,” Poe said quietly, like he doubted his own words.

[You’re right, I don’t, but it’s still possible. He’s a good-looking human by most standards.]

“You think I don’t know that?”

That thing in the pit of Finn’s stomach was suddenly alive again. Like it had risen from the dead with a vengeance, it was jumping, shaking, _screaming_ for Finn to do _something_. He realized then that that thing in his stomach was _hope_. He felt hot all over. Not like the normal gentle warmth he had felt around Poe. Oh no, this was a burning sensation that threatened to consume Finn entirely.

[You’ve been trying to delay this long enough. Preparations for the ship could have been finished with a week ago.]

And with that final blow, the heat became too much and Finn dropped the wrench in his hand and the sound it made was far too loud and piercing in the empty space of the hangar. Poe whipped around to look at him and he panicked.

“Finn?” he heard Poe ask, “Are you okay?”

“I-I-I have to…to…” And then Finn took off running.

He wasn’t sure where he was going. Blood was pounding in his ears, and his muscles ached already. Had he really been running for that long? He vaguely registered bumping into a few concerned passersby on the way, but he just kept going. Until he found himself in his room. Poe’s room. Their room. Which, in hindsight probably wasn’t the best place to go when hiding from Poe, but no matter how much Finn denied it this is where he felt the safest and he wasn’t really thinking when his legs brought him here.

Sure enough though, Poe busted into the room a few minutes later to find Finn just standing in the middle of the room looking lost.

“Okay, Finn,” Poe puffed hard, “I’m done with skirting around this. What the hell is going on with you?”

Finn didn’t want Poe here. Because if Poe was here he might do something ridiculous, and that couldn’t happen right now. Why couldn’t Poe see that? Why was Poe here right now, making this so difficult for Finn? He wanted to cry, or scream, or both.

“What’s going on with _me_?” Finn yelled. “What’s going on with _you_?”

“What are you talking about?” Poe asked, looking genuinely confused which just made Finn more frustrated.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” Finn cried.

“Tell you what?”

“That you loved me!”

Poe froze and there was dead silence.

“How did you know that?” he said quietly, but with a lot of intensity.

Finn matched his intensity. “I know binary, Poe. Have for weeks now.”

“What?”

“Surprise,” Finn said, dripping with sarcasm. It was just a mask really, though. Inside, Finn was dying a little. This wasn’t how this was supposed to go. Poe was supposed to smile when he found out that Finn knew binary and tell Finn how happy he was.

“That’s not possible,” said Poe.

“What, you think I’m not capable of learning binary?” Finn was getting louder again, and he couldn’t stop.

“You would have told me!” Poe yelled back. Finn had never, _ever_ seen Poe angry before, and it hurt so much.

“Oh, like you told me that you loved me?” No, this wasn’t right. None of this was right.

“That’s completely different!” Poe screamed.

“How?!”

“Because I had a reason not to tell you!”

“So did I!”

“WHAT REASON?”

“I wanted to _surprise_ you! Make you happy, Poe. How terrible of me.”

“So you didn’t tell me for _weeks_?”

“Why are we fighting about this?” Finn’s voice finally broke.

“I don’t know!”

And then they were just left standing there. Their bodies tense, panting from the screaming and adrenaline, but all the aggression was gone from their faces. Finn looked at Poe and he just looked _tired_. Poe looked like how Finn had felt for the past week or so, and he understood that feeling all too well. That feeling of loving someone but not being able to communicate it and feeling so stuck. Poe _loved_ him too, and now Poe probably thought his chances were gone for good. Finn couldn’t take it.

He rushed forward and grabbed Poe to pull him in for a bruising kiss. The sound Poe made was mix between a grunt and a whine, and it made Finn go for Poe’s hair. _Finally_ , he was sinking his fingers into those curls. Everything was suddenly fast and furious, the adrenaline of their fight being given a different purpose. 

He could still feel Poe hesitating a bit, and tried to pull him in by his locks. The push made Poe skate his fingers up Finn’s shirt to circle his chest, stomach, and back making his skin break out in goosebumps. Finn sighed and quickly moved his mouth to Poe’s neck.

Poe gasped desperately for a moment. “Finn, I — Finn —“

“Shh,” Finn breathed into his neck, “I love you, Poe. I love you, shh.”

Poe whimpered softly, and pulled Finn up for another kiss, this time with their mouths open to one another. Finn took the chance to press his body as close as he could into Poe’s and Poe seemed to finally give in and let go a bit. Either way it was apparent Poe couldn’t ignore his body because Finn could feel just how hard he was against his thigh.

Finn got impatient and began to strip Poe of his clothing. The second Poe was free of his shirt he followed Finn’s lead and practically tore off Finn’s leather jacket to grip the shirt underneath and pull it over Finn’s head. They went immediately back to ferocious kissing, but with more hands _everywhere_. Finn traded Poe’s curls for his hips and ass, while Poe moved his hands continuously over Finn’s pectoral muscles. Perhaps it was a combination of that and Finn’s repeated grabbing of Poe’s ass to push his thigh between his legs, but Poe eventually broke the heated kiss for a moment to softly huff the word “Wow” between them.

Finn took the chance to move his hands to the front of Poe’s pants and begin undoing them. Without each other’s mouths to occupy them, they both just breathed heavily, desperately trying to catch their breath while watching Finn undo Poe’s pants as fast as humanly possible. Just as he finished, he bodily hoisted Poe up by the backs of his thighs and practically threw him on Poe’s bed faster than Poe could even process what was happening.

Poe moaned louder than he would like to admit into the otherwise quiet room. Especially when he saw the most painfully beautiful picture of a shirtless Finn crawling onto the bed above him on his knees. 

For a moment Finn just hovered there, allowing himself to take in Poe laid out beneath him. He realized that when Poe flushed, it travelled all the way down his neck and to his chest. Finn liked that. He liked that a lot. The entire picture of Poe’s body, his horny expression, and the sound he had made not ten seconds ago were all going straight to Finn’s cock if he was being completely honest. So he bent down to stick his tongue back down Poe’s throat again. Because why not? And while he was at it he grabbed Poe’s thighs again just to rut down roughly into Poe’s erection.

He was rewarded with a high keening sound from Poe followed by short, sharp huffs forced through Poe’s nose because his mouth was otherwise occupied. He was so helpless to Finn in that moment that he hooked his arms over Finn’s shoulders and scraped his nails along his rigid back muscles just in an attempt to hold on to something. The scratches just made Finn push down harder, and it became a vicious cycle: the harder he grinded, the more Poe dug in, and the more Finn would want to get off on his clothed cock, and so on.

Eventually Finn’s hands found their way inside the back of Poe’s trousers and gripped his bare ass tight. Poe’s hips stuttered and he broke the kiss in his shock. Finn began to pull down Poe’s pants relatively slowly, and when it got to the point of no return, Poe nodded quickly and Finn slid them and his underwear all the way off.

If Finn thought he had seen the extent of Poe’s incredible beauty, he was proven wrong the second he saw him in all his glory just for him. Poe’s entire body seemed to be flushed now, especially his dick. It was red, long, and lean and it was begging to be touched by Finn. 

He leaned down and began a methodical exploration of Poe’s upper body with his mouth and hands. Poe’s breath stuttered every time his tongue brushed a nipple, his fingertips skated across his ribs, or his teeth grazed his jugular. It got Finn so hot under the skin that he finally decided to give in to what he and Poe both wanted. He wrapped a hand around Poe’s base and took his cock in his mouth and began sucking.

The keening and whimpering started up again immediately. Poe bucked once at the first suck, but restrained himself after that. He began to also mutter what Finn could only assume were curses under his breath in another language. Oh, Finn couldn’t wait to learn that language as well. He ran a soothing hand up and down the inside of Poe’s inner thigh.

He wasn’t at it for long before Poe nudged him off with a hand on his shoulder. Finn reared back on his knees and Poe sat up, putting him eye-level with Finn’s navel. There was a charged moment where it was silent between them, and Finn watched as Poe just raked his eyes over his chest and abdomen. Then, it seemed like it was Poe’s turn to explore Finn’s body because he pressed his palms against Finn’s overheated skin and gently moved them over the ridges and valleys of his front.

“ _Fuck_ , Finn,” Poe sighed, never taking his eyes off of how every now and again Finn’s muscles would twitch under his fingertips. “You have the body of a damn God.” Poe’s hands roamed everywhere and Finn just let him. He was content with just running his hands through Poe’s hair over and over again. Especially when Poe started running kisses and bites all down his chest and he could cradle his head closer to his body. 

After this went on for a while, it was starting to get to Finn. The bulge in his pants was right in Poe’s face, and after a particularly hard bite to Finn’s hipbone, it became impossible for them to ignore it any longer. Poe heard the noise Finn made and rested his chin on Finn’s abs to look up at him with a devilish expression that almost made Finn lose his cool. Poe’s hands never stopped moving, but he tilted his head in mock innocence and simply said, “You should take your pants off.”

And this time around, it had all the meaning behind it that Finn had been wishing for the first time.

Finn hooked his fingers into his pants, and Poe’s fingers joined his as well. They only pulled it down over his ass before Poe moved to the front and pulled the pants down enough so that Finn’s dick was finally free. He failed to pull his pants the rest of the way off because Poe immediately grabbed hold of him and started stroking.

“ _Oh_ ,” Finn moaned, squeezing his eyes shut from the pleasure. “Oh, _Poe_.” When he eventually opened his eyes, he did so just in time to see Poe watching him with an equally blissed-out expression. Finn watched helplessly as Poe took his bottom lip into his teeth and then ran his tongue over it like it was in slow motion. Finn knew what he was asking for and nodded his head fervently.

“Yeah, yeah Poe, uuh…” he breathed as Poe’s eyes gently sank closed as he simultaneously sank his mouth down Finn’s dick. Just like that first ride on the ship together with Finn’s hand underneath Poe’s and nothing but endless blue above them, Finn couldn’t bring himself to close his eyes. He wanted to see it all. That flight felt like so long ago in this moment, like it wasn’t real. Or maybe this wasn’t real. And Finn didn’t want that. No, even if this was a crazy, realistic, wonderful dream, he didn’t want to risk missing a single second.

Poe looked so beautiful like this, and Finn told him so along with endless repetitions of his name. Every once in a while Poe would look up at him – for reassurance, because it turned him on, or whatever reason – and Finn nearly came every time. After the fifth look they shared it seemed like Poe had had enough and he practically sprang off of Finn’s cock with the wettest, lewdest sound Finn had ever heard. He would freely admit he ogled the shit out of Poe’s body as he twisted to grab something from underneath his mattress.

He returned with a bottle of lube, held it out to Finn, and with the heaviest, most blissed-out expression said the words, “Fuck me.”

Finn’s brain short-circuited for a moment.

He took the bottle and for a second he could only stare dumbly at a beautiful, fully naked Poe asking to be fucked. Meanwhile he’s on his knees with pants around his thighs and his painfully erect cock out.

He felt awful for losing it so momentarily, because it was enough for Poe to recoil from him. “Never mind. We don’t have to do that if you don’t want to. I just –“

“No, no Poe, I – I want to.” He re-opened Poe’s legs a bit from when he retracted, gently stroking his inner thigh in an effort to show Poe that he could be open with him. “I really, _definitely_ , want to. You just…I mean, it’s just something I’ve been imagining for a while now and it’s…hard to believe it’s real, y’know?”

Poe’s eyes softened into an expression that made Finn want to kiss him senseless. “Yeah, I know what you mean.”

Finn smiled gently at Poe and he smiled back.

Regaining his confidence a bit, Poe asked, “So are you going to fuck me?”

Finn responded by uncapping the bottle loudly. Poe sighed and bit his lip again. The sight made Finn pant heavily as he tried to figure out how much lube to apply. As a last thought he awkwardly shimmied out of his pants completely giving his legs the freedom to spread in between Poe’s.

He bent down close to kiss Poe slowly as he gave his first press to Poe’s hole. For a moment he just massaged and then gently sank the first one in. Stars, he was so tight, and it seemed like Poe felt it too because he moaned into Finn’s mouth as the light thrusting began.

When he felt the time was right, he pushed in a second finger, and this time Poe tensed a bit. But only for a second and he assured Finn he was fine. In fact, only seconds after the second one was added and Finn started placing strategically-placed hickeys all over Poe’s neck, Poe whispered into his ear.

“Hey Finn, could –“ Finn grunted in response. “Could you, ah, sit up?”

Finn sat up immediately. “Is something wrong? Should I stop?”

“No! No, I –“ Poe was so out of breath and desperate-sounding that Finn couldn’t help but continue with his thrusts and strokes. That seemed to satisfy Poe because he sighed. He still continued though, “I just…wanted…”

Poe was having a hard time speaking or concentrating with Finn’s fingers up his ass, but Finn saw his eyes trained on his abs and chest. Right as everything clicked in Finn’s head, Poe reached out a hand to gently scrape Finn's muscles and sighed again.

Finn couldn’t help but thrust in his fingers a little harder and a little deeper. “You really like my body that much?”

“By the stars, _yes_ ,” Poe moaned, “it’s the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen other than your face.” He dug his nails in a little deeper on Finn’s upper left pec, left marks across it and caught his nipple along the way.

“Mmm, Poe keep doing that.” Now Finn was panting and sighing right alongside Poe.

“You like that?” Poe asked.

“Yeah, I like that.” Another good scrape followed soon after across his ribs that were straining against his heaving lungs.

“Put in another finger,” Poe huffed so quietly Finn almost didn’t hear it. But he heard it and he quickly grabbed the lube and poured more over Poe’s asshole before pushing in another.

Poe cried out, but kept Finn moving by hooking his leg around his hip as an indicator to not stop.

Feeling emboldened by the sexual experimentation going on, Finn tried crooking his fingers every which way and spreading his fingers to get Poe looser. Poe seemed to like it and at one point had a bodily twitch rack his entire being, to the point that Finn stopped for a split second before Poe growled like an animal in heat.

“Was that good or bad?” Finn asked Poe about the sudden body spasm.

“Good. Good, real good buddy. _Fuck_.” Finn seemed to hit it again. He started to intentionally look for that place and found it a few strokes later. He zeroed in on it and started massaging real slow. Poe started writhing on Finn’s fingers, the sounds coming from him making cum drip from the head of Finn’s cock.

Finn held down his hips with one hand and said, “No moving,” to which Poe responded with a pained whine. Finn was so turned on by it all that without even thinking he thrusted in his fourth finger.

Poe let out a surprised yell that Finn hoped no one was around outside to hear. He started going faster on that one spot and Poe just kept getting louder and louder seemingly out of his own control.

“Fuck me, Finn. Please, please fuck me. I can’t take any more, please,” is what his loud moaning began to turn into. A small, delighted part of Finn almost wanted to just make Poe come like this, on his fingers. Stars, it would be beautiful. Poe would come on his own chest begging for Finn’s cock, and then Finn would come on him as well after. Poe’s flushed chest would look good covered in white. Finn would like to say that the possibility of someone hearing Poe’s ever-growing chants for Finn’s dick was what made him not do that, but he wanted to be inside Poe as much as Poe did. And besides, there was always next time, he thought. The very real possibility of a next time made Finn warm inside.

He removed his fingers as gently as possible from Poe’s ass since he wanted to as quickly as possible grab the lube and put it on his cock. Once ready, he laid his body down on top of Poe, making sure to press his hard abs into Poe’s cock and rub it in between their bodies a bit. It had the desired effect and Poe dug his nails into Finn’s flexed shoulder blades.

He looked into Poe’s very close eyes, and whispered between them. “You want this?”

“ _Yes_ ,” Poe breathed softly into Finn’s lips. “I want you, Finn. Please.”

Finn took his dick in his hand, and pressed it inside Poe. For the first time in the last twenty minutes or so, Poe was silent. His mouth was hanging open but no sound came out, like he was choking on the atmosphere. Finn tried to help him through it as much as he could while he was experiencing his own sensory overload. Poe was so tight and so hot that his vision blurred a couple times. He ran his hand soothingly through Poe’s hair while slowly pushing further and further in. Poe didn’t breathe again until Finn was fully seated.

They just sat there for a moment, listening to and feeling each other breathe. Finn didn’t even register that Poe had probably sunk his fingernails so hard into his back that it was most likely bleeding until Poe started to let up after a moment. Finn took it as his cue to start moving.

The first couple movements were small and slow, but it had them both moaning none-the-less. Finn eventually pulled out further and went harder with each thrust until Poe was rapidly climbing up the noise ladder again. Finn didn’t want to stop this time, though. So he covered Poe’s mouth with his own.

It worked for a while, but there came a point where Finn was trying to find that perfect spot again and simply couldn’t. He knew where it should be, but it was just the wrong angle. He knew Poe was loving it anyway, but he wanted this to be as good as possible for him. And he wanted to see Poe fall apart beneath him. Same thing.

He stopped thrusting for a split-second and immediately grabbed onto Poe’s hips when he tried to start rutting again. Finn panted heavily but got his point across. “I’m gonna move. You gotta be a little quieter for me, yeah? Don’t want anyone disturbing us right? Can you do that for me?” Poe nodded weakly. He looked fucked to kingdom come and Finn tried not to let it go to his head.

Finn sat up in the position they were in previously when he opened Poe up. It would be easier for Finn to find that spot at the angle he was comfortable with. However, Poe took one look at Finn’s full-frontal body and moaned really loud again.

“Shh, Poe. Remember? Quiet, okay? I’ll start off nice and slow.” And he did. In fact, he didn’t even go directly for the prostate. No, he would give Poe time to adjust again. Either way Finn was in heaven while fucking Poe, and if he could milk this moment then he would.

It was nice and gentle and Poe groaned softly while staring at Finn up and down. Eventually, he weakly reached out a hand and ran two fingers up Finn’s chest. That was the moment Finn realized that while he had fucked Poe up against himself, some of Poe’s pre-come got spread all over both of their abs. Finn watched helplessly as Poe leaked even more as he caught the dripping sweat and come on Finn’s muscles that were tensing with every thrust. The final straw was when Poe brought his fingers to his mouth and took his own come and Finn’s sweat in his mouth.

Finn groaned and threw caution to the wind and thrust hard and fast directly into Poe’s prostate. Poe cried out again and immediately tried to silence himself. It was painful for Finn to watch Poe try and cover up those beautiful sounds. Next time, he told himself. Next time. He would buy Poe a house one day, he thought. After this stupid fucking war was over. He didn’t know how but he would buy Poe a house and there they would have it all to themselves and Poe could scream and yell all he wanted while Finn thrust balls-deep inside him. They would live together for years in a peaceful galaxy. Poe could cook and fly for fun instead of for survival. They might get married. They might have kids. Stars, Finn loved Poe so much.

While his feverish brain went on a tirade he put a punishing pace into Poe’s ass. He couldn’t stop pounding even if he wanted to, as the sight of his cock hammering in and out of Poe while his dick was left weeping come onto his bright-red stomach and sweat dripped down the sides of his forehead slicking back his gorgeous hair was simply too much for Finn to handle.

Poe couldn’t take much more, his fists pulling and twisting on the sheets while throwing his head back and letting Finn admire his handiwork scattered across Poe’s neck. After maybe five more rough thrusts, Poe’s ass clenched and twitched around Finn’s dick so hard it made him see stars. He looked up at the incredible feeling of Poe’s hole around him just in time to see come spurting onto Poe’s chest as he climaxed untouched. The sight and sensations pushed Finn over the edge to follow, and he kept thrusting as wave after wave of come spilled deep in Poe and Finn could feel the liquid spread around him hot and wet.

Finn came down from his high long after Poe did, but Poe was still catching his breath anyway. After acknowledging that the adrenaline had quickly washed away and he simply couldn’t hold himself up anymore, Finn pulled out as gently as humanly possible. It was still difficult with each nerve ending still on fire and feeling Poe’s own sensitive aftermath as he twitched helplessly with every tiny movement Finn made.

Finn collapsed and then made himself comfortable next to a sweaty and dazed Poe. He was sure in about five minutes he would feel the overwhelming urge to sleep, but right now he was still thriving and drunk on the events of the last hour or so and the fact that it all really happened. Maybe a minute passed before the silence was broken. By Poe no less.

“So you can understand binary?”

Finn couldn’t help it. He started to laugh. Poe turned his head to look at him and he started giggling too. Finn snuggled in closer to his heat, the sweat cooling on his body making him shiver. He groped blindly for the blanket draped classily over the one comfy chair in their room and laid it across them lazily.

Poe continued giggling at that. “It’s only the beginning of the sun’s second cycle! We can’t go to sleep, we have a whole day ahead of us.”

Finn just nuzzled in to the crook of Poe’s neck and mumbled into his skin. “We can go to dinner later. We were just going to go flying all day anyway. And if I remember correctly the ship was ready a week ago.” Finn swears he could feel Poe blush and heat up underneath him.

“Yeah, well, I was kind of looking for an excuse to have you near me.” Before Finn could comment on that, Poe quickly rushed on. “And what about BB-8? They’re probably worried. Last they knew I ran off after a manic Finn.”

Finn placed gentle kisses across Poe’s neck. “Shh, I’m sure they’re fine. BB-8 probably followed you and you weren’t exactly being quiet.”

Poe got warmer next to him. Finn liked it and snuggled in further. “Gosh who knew you’d be the lazy one after sex. I was worried someone as young and spry like you would be ready to go another round.”

“Oh yeah? I thought you’d be a bit lazier after all that.” Poe was slurring a bit, but he didn’t seem all that tired to Finn. “You looked blissed out of your mind on my cock.” 

Poe finally brought his bright red face to face Finn’s. “You’re ridiculous you know that?” he said with a smile. “But you were pretty good at that in my defence.”

Finn smiled back. “You’re not so bad yourself.”

Poe’s smile faded into something a little softer. “You didn’t answer my question.”

“Hm?”

“When did you learn binary? And why? And how did I not know?”

Finn sighed. The sleepy feelings were grabbing hold of him fast, but he owed Poe an explanation. “You weren’t supposed to know. Not at first. I wanted it to be a surprise for you. And BB-8. I grabbed some records and materials from the library and learned whenever you were at work. It wasn’t that hard to hide. You were away a lot and my books were in that chest you brought me for months.”

Poe groaned into the pillow. “I knew that thing felt heavy when I tried to move it last week.”

Finn smiled. “I thought things would get harder when we started working on _Nayanta_ , but instead I started to learn faster from hearing you and BB-8 talk.”

“So how long exactly did it take you?”

Gosh, math was hard right now. Finn was so tired. “Maybe…two and a half standard months? Almost three?”

Poe looked shocked. Finn gave him a look. “Three months?” Finn nodded slowly. “Three _months_? Finn it took me three _years_ to understand binary and I was surrounded by it all the time.”

“This is kind of my thirteenth language that I know?”

“Thirteen?” Poe breathed in awe.

“Yeah, more like ten. I forgot most of two other ones.”

It was silent for a moment before Poe said, “You’re incredible, Finn.”

Poe ran his hand along the base of Finn’s neck and it felt amazingly soothing. He continued staring at Finn in both awe, wonderment, and adoration. He wanted to spill to Finn about the lake and how he chickened out from the moment he had planned for weeks. About how he was sorry he had somehow given Finn the impression that he wasn’t interested and sent Finn into his weird spiral of misery. About how he thinks he’s been in love with Finn since they reunited on the tarmac and found out that the other wasn’t dead.

But Finn looked exhausted, and Poe was feeling the gentle lull of sleep pulling him down as well. And maybe all these things didn’t even need to be said. Not right now. Another time. Another time.

For now, Poe just whistled quietly through the gaps in his teeth.

Finn opened his eyes a crack, and smirked a little at Poe. “Did you just tell me ‘I love you’ in binary?”

Poe just smiled lazily back, so happy, and Finn finally felt at peace. _This_ was what he had wanted when he set out to learn binary. For Poe to be happy.

Finn did his best to whistle back “I love you, too,” before shutting his eyes and drifting off.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading babes! Stay classy.


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